Shawn Mendes: there's a desperation for me to come out as being gay | Update: Shawn comments on the gay rumors again

[Jordan Miller]

Update: Shawn talked about the gay rumors in a new interview on Dax Shepard's podcast.

“It was so, so frustrating for me because there were some people in my life that I was very very close to, who were gay and in the closet,” Shawn said about the rumors that he’s gay.

He continued, “And I felt like this real anger for those people. It’s such a tricky thing. You want to say, ‘I’m not gay but it’d be fine if I was gay — but also there’s nothing wrong with being gay but I’m not.’ You don’t really know how to respond to the situation.”

Shawn added, “I’ve realized that we just have to stop having to be experts and politicians about it, especially as a famous musician who’s a guy. I need to be really f—ing messy and say the wrong things and apologize and say the right thing after I apologize and be confused about how to respond when people say I’m gay. Everyone’s been calling me gay since I was 15 years old. I’m not gay and I’m like, ‘What does that mean?’ I had these problems with the way my voice sounded. I’m like, ‘How do I sit?’ I’m always first to cross my legs and sit with a position of this feminine style and I really suffered with that s–.”

“I think a lot of guys go through that and even worse than that there are just so many guys who are gay and in the closet and must be hearing s— like that and just being like, ‘I’m terrified to come out,’” he continued.

“I didn’t grow up wrestling,” Shawn said. “I grew up getting my hair braided on New Year’s Eve. It just completely depends on the way you grew up in your life and your surroundings.”

He added: “I’m in a relationship where my girlfriend is like, ‘We’re going to get in bed and you’re going to put your head on my chest and you’re going to cry into my chest. You’re going to tell me how you feel because if you don’t do that you’re just going to be an ***hole for the next week and I’m not going to deal with that s—. I’m just lucky to be in a relationship that’s for it.” 

Earlier:

Shawn Mendes is addressing the non-existent elephant in the room. For years, fans and followers have pressed Shawn on his ***uality, gaslighting him to wonder if he might be gay. 

In his new interview with The Guardian, Shawn...

• For the millionth time confirms he's hetero***ual. 
  
  ”It is funny, I say: here you are talking now about your lack of authenticity in the past, but the one thing you were accused of faking was your relationship with Camila, which is real. “There was a desperation for me to come out as being gay, which is such a ridiculous thing. I got upset because I know people who are gay who haven’t come out and I know the suffering they experience because of that. It’s just completely ignorant and insensitive of people to be on that ****.”
   
• The maddening goal of trying to reach new heights of success each era
  
  “Perhaps it is not so surprising that Mendes is so sensitive to criticism. For all the millions of fans, he has plenty of detractors who say he lacks personality, his music is bland and formulaic, and that his relationship with Cabello is a PR stunt designed to boost both careers. That must hurt, but I am still amazed when he says he gets upset if anybody dislikes his music. That’s bonkers, I say, because the music is designed for a particular demographic; it is inevitable that some people won’t like it. He nods. Of course, he knows that. “That’s the problem. That’s where you go into a complete meltdown, when you try to make something that’s impossible to make: something that the whole world likes.... He nods again, and smiles. “It is a psychological head-****. It completely is, and that’s after three therapists and 55 self-help books plus meditation and exercise and life experience and all of the things I’ve been working through for the last year and a half.”
   
• His last two singles not being successful 
  
  “Now, he says, he has finally got the balance right in life. I mention that his last two singles have not been so successful. Is he at a stage where he can accept that, or even embrace it? “I could not care less, to be honest. I guess what people don’t see are the emails and messages I get about how inspired those songs have made people feel.”

 

The interviewer went in.

It's my personal opinion that Shawn's music isn't performing as well on the charts because the GP isn't buying his relationship with Camila (even though it's none of our damn business tbh). That, and he is widely perceived as someone who's closeted - no matter what he does that's following him. I also think the illusion of him being single when he was releasing music previous to this boosted sales. All that, combined with his new quarantine look (the wild hair and slender physique), resulted in worse sales. Which sucks cause Wonder is a pretty great album (despite what Pitchfork thinks lol). 

Thoughts, Exhale? 

 

Related:

 

[LFurbish89]

It’s really sad that someone is being accused of lying about their ***uality by people who have zero proof. We need to be better as LGBTQ people. We are essentially doing to him what was done to (many of) us in middle school.

Also the new album is fantastic.

[Blackout2006]

I agree. It is anyways very problematic to say someone is gay when they continuously say they are straight. Maybe he just explores his feminine side more than his masculine side like Harry Styles? It is extremely rude to say the stuff some of the people over here say but they go under the radar for it  

[CindyTheTVisLeaking]

Gay or not, this man had once mocked Britney's mental problems 

His boring music sucks just as much as his cruel heart does 

 

[Blackout2006]

3 minutes ago, LFurbish89 said:

It’s really sad that someone is being accused of lying about their ***uality by people who have zero proof. We need to be better as LGBTQ people. We are essentially doing to him what was done to (many of) us in middle school.

Also the new album is fantastic.

Exactly. It’s bullying if you ask me. Where’s the difference of using the word gay as an insult or calling a straight men gay? They are both problematic and disgusting either way! Some people here need to do better here considering they know the struggle

[redacted statement]

Yeah, all these thirsty gays needs to be called out for constantly gaslighting him into thinking he's gay. It's so questionable and gross... It's gross not to believe him when he says he's straight, and even if he were gay, it would still be gross because you would be robbing him of his own personal coming out journey, which takes time for some people. Aren't we the ones who should know better?  Plus, you're just reinforcing stereotypes that a lot of people are fighting against. 

[bitbitboi]

The same happened to Ricky Martin. He was always considered gay and bullied for it, and he couldn't rest from those allegations until he came out as an adult. What is crazy is that the media, at least when it comes to the entertainment aspect of it, is made up mainly of gay people, let's be honest. So this to me feels like the pressure of the "gay agenda", even against the people in the same community. Being gay and closeted is a valid choice too.

[Blackout2006]

1 minute ago, iAlwaysSingLive said:

Yeah, all these thirsty gays needs to be called out for constantly gaslighting him into thinking he's gay. It's so questionable and gross... It's gross not to believe him when he says he's straight, and even if he were gay, it would still be gross because you would be robbing him of his own personal coming out journey, which takes time for some people. Aren't we the ones who should know better? 

And some of these fans just do it because off him impersonating Britney shaving her head. I get it, you as a Britney fan would feel triggered, but do they know that they are stooping as low as he did when they say some of the disgusting stuff hey saw of him being gay when he isn’t? It’s sickening honestly...

[BlurredLover]

WHEN OH WHEN WILL HE go away please oh please 

[mythology]

His ***uality is.none of anyone's concern, let him be.  His new album is decent as well, very chill

[NachoCheese]

I guess him addressing the internet trolls is supposed to boost the album sales?

[Midnight]

Alright, alright I'll go listen to the new album already goshhh 

 

[G-unit]

I think this is where such a big portion of the community is so toxic and it’s what makes me sad.  So many members of this community feel entitled to know and dismiss them when they deny it.  Other communities are just as horrible when it comes to this topic as well.

 It’s none of anyone’s business.  People come out when they’re ready to.  Sometimes people don’t ever come out because they are too afraid (and with the world we live in, it’s totally understandable).  But questioning someone on their ***uality is NEVER acceptable under any circumstances.  That is for THAT person to bring up.  I hated growing up and people always saying “you’re gay, right?”.  Ok...I hadn’t come out.  So, in that moment, someone (typically a complete stranger) is, essentially asking me to out myself or lie.  I always chose to lie, because who the **** is this person and why do they have a right to know something so personal about me?  In that moment, especially as a kid, telling the truth lead to fear of abandonment, shame, hate, and potential violence.  Discussing someone’s ***uality has serious implications on that person if they are not openly out.  A lot of times, people will ask you these question in front of an audience of other people.  And that is EMBARRASSING.  People need to learn humanity and let people come out when they are ready to discuss it. I will never understand the obsession over another person’s ***uality, but under no circumstances is it EVER ok to bring that up to someone in an attempt to get them to tell you if they are gay or not.

 

[Urbanney]

30 minutes ago, LFurbish89 said:

It’s really sad that someone is being accused of lying about their ***uality by people who have zero proof. We need to be better as LGBTQ people. We are essentially doing to him what was done to (many of) us in middle school.

Seriously. It's so irritating coming on to any Exhale thread about Shawn and people saying "Shawn come out already." 

It just shows a complete lack of respect for Shawn and pretty much enforces stereotypes.

[khaleesi]

Honestly, I think it's mostly his new look... It's just eww. 
On another note; Jordan why is SE.xU.ALI.TY censored? EXCUSE YOU!  
 

[Urbanney]

9 minutes ago, G-unit said:

I think this is where such a big portion of the community is so toxic and it’s what makes me sad.  So many members of this community feel entitled to know and dismiss them when they deny it.  Other communities are just as horrible when it comes to this topic as well.

 It’s none of anyone’s business.  People come out when they’re ready to.  Sometimes people don’t ever come out because they are too afraid (and with the world we live in, it’s totally understandable).  But questioning someone on their ***uality is NEVER acceptable under any circumstances.  That is for THAT person to bring up.  I hated growing up and people always saying “you’re gay, right?”.  Ok...I hadn’t come out.  So, in that moment, someone (typically a complete stranger) is, essentially asking me to out myself or lie.  I always chose to lie, because who the **** is this person and why do they have a right to know something so personal about me?  In that moment, especially as a kid, telling the truth lead to fear of abandonment, shame, hate, and potential violence.  Discussing someone’s ***uality has serious implications on that person if they are not openly out.  A lot of times, people will ask you these question in front of an audience of other people.  And that is EMBARRASSING.  People need to learn humanity and let people come out when they are ready to discuss it. I will never understand the obsession over another person’s ***uality, but under no circumstances is it EVER ok to bring that up to someone in an attempt to get them to tell you if they are gay or not.

 

Yes, go off. Say it again for the people in the back! 

  

[dr35]

39 minutes ago, LFurbish89 said:

It’s really sad that someone is being accused of lying about their ***uality by people who have zero proof. We need to be better as LGBTQ people. We are essentially doing to him what was done to (many of) us in middle school.

Also the new album is fantastic.

Proof doesn’t matter. Even if someone had it... he doesn’t owe ANYBODY a damn thing. Especially his ***uality and personal life. People need grow the **** up.

i swear, the gay male community has gone from being the victims of constant harassment, which made me scared to come out at 25, to the complete opposite. We’re now the childish bullies, squabbling over divas, body image and salacious gossip. 

[Brat]

Gays want him to be gay because he’s attractive 

[DougFrmBrazil]

What about Charlie Puth?

[DougFrmBrazil]

11 minutes ago, Brat said:

Gays want him to be gay because he’s attractive 

and yet no one will have him, LOL.