Britney's Memoir ''The Woman In Me'' | Out Now | Discussion with spoilers

[Slave4Brit88]

On 10/26/2023 at 4:26 AM, iZacaree said:

I just finished reading the book this morning. And I have THOUGHTS: 

I’d like to start off by saying that the book is a lot shorter than I was expecting it be. Given all of the drama in Britney’s life, both before, during, and after the conservatorship, I was expecting a lot more material. Of course there are a few “bombshells” but a lot of events are skimmed over without much detail or explanation. We are only given brief summaries of certain events that should’ve probably been given more attention. 
 

The book reads a lot like Britney’s Instagram captions in many ways. A lot of the book details how Britney FELT during certain events, rather than detailing what actually happened. There is a lot of: “it hurt my heart”, “I felt embarrassed”, “it felt weird”, etc etc etc, without going into great detail on the event itself. 
 

I felt like Britney took accountability for some of her part in what went wrong in her life, but still tried to make excuses for her behavior. One example is when she tried to defend leaving her young babies with her mother or a nanny to go out, party, and get drunk with Paris Hilton. She doesn’t seem to take any accountability for why this was a problem and how it made her look really bad during her custody battle with K-Fed, although she does later on reflect back on how “stupid” she was during this time in her life. 
 

She describes herself as “wild”, “bad”, and “rebellious” during her 2007 breakdown and she does use the word “breakdown” to describe it. She also admits to abusing adderall (an amphetamine) which led to her strange behavior at the time. She still spends a lot of time explaining her behavior as “understandable” and seems to minimize just how off the rails she really was. It’s clear that she doesn’t fully grasp the extent of how her own behavior was destroying her life at this time and resulted in her loss of custody of her kids. Nowhere does she take accountability for losing her kids - she only continuously blames others, particularly K-fed, for not letting her see them. Of course, a simple Google search, will show you that this wasn’t true. A custody agreement was in place, but she failed to show up for parenting classes, dr*g tests, and court dates, and continued abusing adderall and partying, so that’s why she lost custody. It was certainly a little frustrating to read her try to portray herself as an innocent victim in this situation. It was also troubling to see her write that she probably would have “gotten it together” eventually without anyone’s help. While that’s a possibility, I am familiar with how dr*g abuse/addiction works and it would’ve been refreshing to hear how she realized she needed help in that situation rather than minimizing the severity of it and downplaying it as her “wild” times. 
 

Britney talks about how those around her infantilized her, but then she spends a great deal of time infantilizing herself. You’ll see phrases like “my little heart” and “my little body” quite often. She frequently compares herself to a little girl and how she views the world as such. 
 

We all know Brit isn’t the most articulate person in the world, but I felt like seeing dramatic or heavy situations being described as just “kind of odd”, “weird”, or “amazing” downplayed the true nature of the event being described.
 

The entire book felt very much like it was written by a middle-schooler who had to write a book report and wasn’t great a writing but did the best they could. Most people will buy it for the “bombshells”, but for most fans, the vast majority of these “bombshells” were already rumors or accepted as fact in the fan community. Everything else is just loosely described or condensed into one or two paragraphs with not much detail or explanation. 
 

Probably the most powerful part of the book is the description of the conservatorship, it takes up a good chunk of the book, itself, and seems to be where Britney placed the most detail - for good reason, as it was the longest and most difficult event she has faced in her life to date. Her description of her time locked up in the facility is particularly disturbing. Unfortunately, her retelling of the months leading up to the end of the conservatorship and the immediate aftermath feel a little rushed, as does the end of the book itself. 
 

You can definitely tell where the ghost writer’s work begins and Britney’s ends. While reading, there were many times where I caught myself thinking, “Britney definitely didn’t remember this detail. This was definitely the ghost writer after doing his research”. Especially when it came to certain exact dates, song chart positions, career details, etc.

Overall, the book was okay, but it definitely isn’t the expansive memoir many of us were probably hoping for. It’s more like a brief retelling of Britney’s life with major emphasis on her feelings, rather than a focus on recounting certain events in detail. It’s also incredibly depressing given her life circumstances and how such a bright, talented, young woman was basically destroyed by corruption in the legal system and her own family. The dark side of fame is blatantly obvious here. 
 

I give the book 6/10
 

At the risk of getting dragged I agree. It is just absolutely way too short, I am appreciative of what Britney puts out and this isn’t to drag her or anything, just giving my review. I didn’t feel like I got much insight into anything from this book, it’s skips over things SO quick. The two 5150s are covered over like two pages (with big print). I got more insight into Britney from her unreleased songs and letters of truth on her blog tbh (which when I discovered is when I went from being a fan to a stan because they unveiled a deeper side of her to me I didn’t previously know about) and I find the threads from Steel Magnolia and others on here more interesting tbh, Britney remains a mystery - and particularly 2007. It was especially disappointing not to read anything about Original Doll, the Jerylls or Blair Berk/Sam Lutfi. It’s not the book I hoped for when she mentioned it in For The Record - I think Britney could write a book of 1,000 pages to tell her entire story honestly, but of course it’s up to her what she puts out.
 

What I gather is she had a pretty traumatic childhood that was obviously covered up from us all on her debut. JT break up and his treatment was the start of a downward spiral and she needed more time off to heal from that, also doesn’t seem like she ever had much support family wise and didn’t feel good enough in their eyes - which is hilarious they should feel they could make her feel that way since they are a bunch of jobless loser bums (I swear there is major family scapegoat syndrome going on with the Spears). Kevin marriage/breakdown was at that point the final straw I feel - and I totally empathize with her, it was obviously an AWFUL choice to be with him but it must’ve hurt so bad to be Britney freakin Spears and your deadbeat bum husband is off not wanting anything to do with you. I think at that point she was really unwell as we know, and I do agree she does minimize/gloss over her part in some things in the book. She never did anything to warrant a c-ship or having a freakin full on SWAT team bust in and take her to hospital like a criminal on the run but in the custody case she did many things to hurt her case and doesn’t mention them in the book. I think despite her insistences she wanted a family young maybe she was too young at that point, due to her upbringing/stardom we saw her obviously want to do things she felt like she’d missed out on, like partying, which aren’t really appropriate to do excessively when you have young children at home. If she had the right partner at a bit older age I think it would’ve gone much better and my heart aches for her. While Britney made many errors at that time I still believe Kevin’s actions really destroyed her and eventually her relationship with her boys, I totally despise that scum.
 

It’s also incredibly depressing given her life circumstances and how such a bright, talented, young woman was basically destroyed by corruption in the legal system and her own family

Totally agree with this, it’s so upsetting how everything turned out and while Britney isn’t perfect and made her mistakes it’s largely down to greed and money. The Hollywood sharks must’ve been rubbing their hands with glee when they spotted they could get access to her money through moron Jamie Spears. Britney genuinely has the worst family ever. I really think if she had ppl in her life who really loved her for her and not what she could do for them things would be very different. If you look at all the ppl who’ve survived childhood fame well, like Sarah Michelle Gellar or Mandy Moore for instance, they have strong family support system. Britney needed love and support but instead was abused and exploited, a very cautionary tale on fame indeed. 

[Moscow]

On 10/26/2023 at 4:14 AM, Hypnotherapy said:

Random- does she mention lip syncing or singing/her voice?

Well she always sings live so why would she?

[rebellion_is_the_way]

 

[rebellion_is_the_way]

 

[Prince Ali]

I was finally able to read it all. It was great. i loved how the language of the book was simple and well written. She definitely used ghost writers but it wasn't that obvious and you could feel all the time you are reading something that she prepared.

Too bad nobody ever helped her and just gave her time to process her break up, her pregnancy and divorce. She was always under so much scrutiny and it makes me sick to my stomach thinking how she must felt when Jamie told her I am Britney Spears now.. 

I was only hoping to hear a bit more about all the stuff that was happening during cship when it comes to her career.. she barely mentioned FF, and rest she already told us during her court hearing. But either way, I hope everybody reads this book and change their perspective a bit and just let her live her own life. 

So well done, Britney on finally being able to share your side of the story

Spoiler

And I cackled so hard when she said she knew some of her songs were nto great, that she was robot like in Vegas as she was already over it, or when she was really energized and motivated... it all tracks well to what we all discussed here on Exhale

 

[iZacaree]

17 hours ago, Slave4Brit88 said:

At the risk of getting dragged I agree. It is just absolutely way too short, I am appreciative of what Britney puts out and this isn’t to drag her or anything, just giving my review. I didn’t feel like I got much insight into anything from this book, it’s skips over things SO quick. The two 5150s are covered over like two pages (with big print). I got more insight into Britney from her unreleased songs and letters of truth on her blog tbh (which when I discovered is when I went from being a fan to a stan because they unveiled a deeper side of her to me I didn’t previously know about) and I find the threads from Steel Magnolia and others on here more interesting tbh, Britney remains a mystery - and particularly 2007. It was especially disappointing not to read anything about Original Doll, the Jerylls or Blair Berk/Sam Lutfi. It’s not the book I hoped for when she mentioned it in For The Record - I think Britney could write a book of 1,000 pages to tell her entire story honestly, but of course it’s up to her what she puts out.
 

What I gather is she had a pretty traumatic childhood that was obviously covered up from us all on her debut. JT break up and his treatment was the start of a downward spiral and she needed more time off to heal from that, also doesn’t seem like she ever had much support family wise and didn’t feel good enough in their eyes - which is hilarious they should feel they could make her feel that way since they are a bunch of jobless loser bums (I swear there is major family scapegoat syndrome going on with the Spears). Kevin marriage/breakdown was at that point the final straw I feel - and I totally empathize with her, it was obviously an AWFUL choice to be with him but it must’ve hurt so bad to be Britney freakin Spears and your deadbeat bum husband is off not wanting anything to do with you. I think at that point she was really unwell as we know, and I do agree she does minimize/gloss over her part in some things in the book. She never did anything to warrant a c-ship or having a freakin full on SWAT team bust in and take her to hospital like a criminal on the run but in the custody case she did many things to hurt her case and doesn’t mention them in the book. I think despite her insistences she wanted a family young maybe she was too young at that point, due to her upbringing/stardom we saw her obviously want to do things she felt like she’d missed out on, like partying, which aren’t really appropriate to do excessively when you have young children at home. If she had the right partner at a bit older age I think it would’ve gone much better and my heart aches for her. While Britney made many errors at that time I still believe Kevin’s actions really destroyed her and eventually her relationship with her boys, I totally despise that scum.
 

It’s also incredibly depressing given her life circumstances and how such a bright, talented, young woman was basically destroyed by corruption in the legal system and her own family

Totally agree with this, it’s so upsetting how everything turned out and while Britney isn’t perfect and made her mistakes it’s largely down to greed and money. The Hollywood sharks must’ve been rubbing their hands with glee when they spotted they could get access to her money through moron Jamie Spears. Britney genuinely has the worst family ever. I really think if she had ppl in her life who really loved her for her and not what she could do for them things would be very different. If you look at all the ppl who’ve survived childhood fame well, like Sarah Michelle Gellar or Mandy Moore for instance, they have strong family support system. Britney needed love and support but instead was abused and exploited, a very cautionary tale on fame indeed. 

Agreed! 
 

I also get the sense that Britney genuinely doesn’t remember a lot of specific details. I know I will get dragged for this, but all the delulu fans already know this deep down… Britney is ditzy, to say the least. I don’t think she knows certain career details or even cares about them, nor do I think she understands what was going on in her life on a deeper level. She also mentions that she was treated like a “bank robber” and how those around her treated her like she was dangerous, but she fails to ever own the fact that she was a danger to herself and her SELF destructive behavior created so much chaos in her life. I was hoping for more accountability, but sadly she doesn’t seem to have a good perspective on the events in her past. Maybe it will come with more time, who knows. 

[Hamelia]

I had to stop again, it's too heartbreaking to read about her stay in the facility.

It's true that she skims over many things. Maybe it was too hard for her to go into details. Maybe the impending probate trial prevented some information at this point in time. Maybe the book was meant for the GP who are not interested in details of her music.

The important message is that she was treated like an incompetent child while she was providing the livelihood for the exact same people who treated her like a child robot. Chicken and canned veggies? What kind of horrible diet is that? Prison food? No wonder she needed supplements.

 

Edited October 30, 2023 by Hamelia

[Tingle2mingle86]

People STILL refuse to meet Britney where she is today!  Sad... 😔 

This journey she is taking is just that HER journey. She's going to express what she wants, when she wants, how she wants, and it's her truth.  She doesn't owe a single person anything. She's simply telling part of her story as she wants.  And there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.  It's what we all do every single day.

In 5 years she'll be in a much different place and her perspective will, as it does for us all each and every year we are fortunate to live it, change.  So allow her to express herself where she is today before talking about how she forgot this and that, isn't doing whatever it is you believe she should, etc etc.  Silly little humans.

Edited October 30, 2023 by Tingle2mingle86

[Juan G]

21 minutes ago, iZacaree said:

Agreed! 
 

I also get the sense that Britney genuinely doesn’t remember a lot of specific details. I know I will get dragged for this, but all the delulu fans already know this deep down… Britney is ditzy, to say the least. I don’t think she knows certain career details or even cares about them, nor do I think she understands what was going on in her life on a deeper level. She also mentions that she was treated like a “bank robber” and how those around her treated her like she was dangerous, but she fails to ever own the fact that she was a danger to herself and her SELF destructive behavior created so much chaos in her life. I was hoping for more accountability, but sadly she doesn’t seem to have a good perspective on the events in her past. Maybe it will come with more time, who knows. 

How was she a TRUE danger to herself (honest question)?

Leaving kids with a nanny/mom every once in a while is not a bad thing. There’s nothing wrong with that at all. 

[Hamelia]

1 minute ago, Juan G said:

How was she a TRUE danger to herself (honest question)?

Leaving kids with a nanny/mom every once in a while is not a bad thing. There’s nothing wrong with that at all. 

She wasn't. 

Her father was. 

[Tingle2mingle86]

On 10/29/2023 at 4:04 PM, DuranDuran said:

It's about Judy Ho, she was working at Bridges to Recovery, i.e. the facility where Britney was held against her will

 

Team con's minion, Sam, was a reoccurring guest on "The doctors" with Judy Ho who co-hosted this show

 

And Jodi Montgomery had Judy on her Venmo list:

https://twitter.com/TSBrit114/status/1591159698895822849

 

 

WHAT IN THE ACTUAL **** 😑

And honestly, it still boggles my mind that people are so quick to dismiss how twisted and entangled everyone involved in Britney's conservatorship was and still is.  You literally can't make this **** up.

 

Thank you for this!!!

[Slave4Brit88]

6 hours ago, iZacaree said:

Agreed! 
 

I also get the sense that Britney genuinely doesn’t remember a lot of specific details. I know I will get dragged for this, but all the delulu fans already know this deep down… Britney is ditzy, to say the least. I don’t think she knows certain career details or even cares about them, nor do I think she understands what was going on in her life on a deeper level. She also mentions that she was treated like a “bank robber” and how those around her treated her like she was dangerous, but she fails to ever own the fact that she was a danger to herself and her SELF destructive behavior created so much chaos in her life. I was hoping for more accountability, but sadly she doesn’t seem to have a good perspective on the events in her past. Maybe it will come with more time, who knows. 

I wouldn’t be surprised if she doesn’t remember a lot tbh, I acknowledge this is all my total speculation but Britney from late 09 onwards feels like a completely different person to before. I wouldn’t be surprised if that’s due to her being heavily medicated after she found out the con isn’t ending. Things like she could hardly remember her VMAs performance with NSYNC etc, it’s awful but I really worry what all the stress/heavy meds did to her memory. I know she can be ditzy at times but I do think she can also be insightful, that’s what I hoped for more in the book and why I’ve found it disappointing that it covers huge events over like 1 page without much insight. I’m not sure I would use ditzy so much as again I really feel like she’s so different after 09 and much of that is probably due to trauma/medication, if she was in a position to write the book back then it might he totally different. For instance I enjoy the insight in For The Record and it makes total sense to me that her world collapsed after the relationship breakdown with Kevin because she put everything she had into it, and if you’re Britney Spears is it not totally humiliating and devastating to be stood up by someone the media is basically calling the biggest bum in America. She was definitely self destructive in 07 and I think she did need help, but actual love and help from ppl who care - not a hostile takeover of her life. She did leave/gloss over a lot of that time and it would’ve been good to hear much more - especially since I’m still on the fence over Lutfi and how he even came to be in her life. It leaves a lot to be desired and I’m not sure if she’s actually serious about writing a second part lol, because to me this feels incomplete.

[Xanax]

On 10/24/2023 at 10:32 AM, TommyX said:

What about Larry Rudolph? 

She doesn’t really mention Larry much. Which is weird….

[ObsessedBritFan1]

Ok, so finally got the book from the library (I know I know I’m late) and I'm 20 pages in and I'm like... Why have we devoted this much time to eluding that everyone (including herself) in the family may be senile and prone to causing car accidents??

Will report more later.

[ObsessedBritFan1]

I finished the book. I'm in shock. I didn't realize how sensitive Britney was and how traumatic fame was for her in the early years. Her social anxiety (prob depression) and breakup really messed her up. I thought it was really cute how Madonna came to her rescue. I have a whole new respect for her. Imagine Madonna freaking Madonna randomly visiting you at your condo in NYC.

I die. That's flawless. 

Also, she never really liked fame. That was shocking!! Biggest freakin star in the world doesn't actually care