Are you a Quiet or a Talkative person?

[Jamie Lynn Forever]

"Are you shy? You need to be louder and more outspoken. Are you not having fun, is that why you're quiet? You should talk more. Why don't you talk a lot? Are you sad?" 

...I'm so tired of explaining myself to new people I meet. Being quiet does not equal shyness, anti-social or any other 'negative' connotations you might think. The reason I am so quiet is because I just find conversations so exhausing and most of the time it bores me , it's draining my energy 

 

How about you ?

[Danielle1987]

You said it, sister. 
 

I’m not shy, I’m introverted. 
I’n not talking enough to you? Oh, it’s probably because you’re not interesting enough to me to invest any of my energy into. Am I quiet? Maybe. Depends on what mood I’m in. 
 

As an introvert, socializing drains my energy. My alone time “recharges” me. Extroverts are the opposite. & introversion vs. extroversion is actually based on how you recharge, not on “shyness”, as many ignorant people think. There’s actually such things as extroverted introverts/ introverted extroverts. 

The people i’m closest to understand my introverted ways and know I need lots of alone time & they do not take that offensively.

I’m also an INTP on the MBTI. Sounds like you may be, too. INTPs seem shy and aloof to anyone whom the INTP hasn’t deemed “worthy of their time”. If ya don’t pique my interest / you may as well be invisible & you’re a waste of my time/energy. & I DONT CARE if this makes me seem like a b1tch. Super unapologetic for being myself. 

[Jamie Lynn Forever]

1 hour ago, Danielle1987 said:

You said it, sister. 
 

I’m not shy, I’m introverted. 
I’n not talking enough to you? Oh, it’s probably because you’re not interesting enough to me to invest any of my energy into. Am I quiet? Maybe. Depends on what mood I’m in. 
 

As an introvert, socializing drains my energy. My alone time “recharges” me. Extroverts are the opposite. & introversion vs. extroversion is actually based on how you recharge, not on “shyness”, as many ignorant people think. There’s actually such things as extroverted introverts/ introverted extroverts. 

The people i’m closest to understand my introverted ways and know I need lots of alone time & they do not take that offensively.

I’m also an INTP on the MBTI. Sounds like you may be, too. INTPs seem shy and aloof to anyone whom the INTP hasn’t deemed “worthy of their time”. If ya don’t pique my interest / you may as well be invisible & you’re a waste of my time/energy. & I DONT CARE if this makes me seem like a b1tch. Super unapologetic for being myself. 

That's how i feel too. When people dislike someone they express it by ignoring them. So when you're quiet people assume you're angry at them because it's a more common occurrence. I've had multiple people tell me that before they got to know me they thought I was a snob because I was so quiet. I guess quietly minding your own business can come across as offensive. On the bright side this actually caused me to be a little more outgoing because I really don't want people to think I'm a snob.

Some people are put off by quiet people. I think it's a combination of thinking the quiet person doesn't like them (which is an unbearable thought for some folks!) And because they don't know what is going through their heads, so a trust issue of sorts.

I think society has become such a way that everything about everyone at any given time has to be known. It's like communication voyeurism. When your quiet, minding your own business, not bothering anyone, many sociopaths, narcissistic types are picking up on it, not because their an introvert, nope, but because they need to know what you're thinking so they can adjust for any given situation. To sum up, our introvert behavior puts others on edge because they can not gauge where we are at so they can adjust accordingly. It is something wrong with them for the need to do this, not us. 

As for the MBTI test, i'm not really sure. Every time i take any MBTI test i either score INFP or INTP. I guess it depends on my mood/state of mind. Every test I have taken shows that I score almost an even 50% on the thinking/feeling spectrum. To be honest, I see myself sharing the traits of both an INFP and INTP person, at different times, in different circumstances.

 

 

[Blackout2006]

I lean more to the talkative side even tho im an ambivert

[Danielle1987]

17 hours ago, NotLouTaylor said:

. It is something wrong with them for the need to do this, not us. 

 

Indeed. I’ve also found (some) extroverts can get “frustrated” with introverts cuz we do not engage with them & that means they don’t get to have a reason to talk. So many people love hearing themselves talk (especially about themselves) 
 

SORRY I’M NOT AN OUTLET FOR YOU TO HEAR YOURSELF TALK!

People are so self-absorbed 

[Alestaos]

I'm quiet, and it sometimes causes issues. And people mistake my shyness for meekness/ignorance its not i just need my space haha

But i also get anxiety in new places with new people so i don't even engage with them until i am like 2-3weeks into knowing them and seeing what i have observed etc.

[Alestaos]

[FullyDattAndDatt3full]

i love to talk, although i choose people i talk with

[princessmimi]

Honestly it depends.

Like for me, im more quiet and shy in social gatherings while with people I know im more confident and talkative

(although lately its been kind of hard)

Anyways overall im a mix of both

[princessmimi]

On 11/24/2020 at 12:30 PM, Danielle1987 said:

You said it, sister. 
 

I’m not shy, I’m introverted. 
I’n not talking enough to you? Oh, it’s probably because you’re not interesting enough to me to invest any of my energy into. Am I quiet? Maybe. Depends on what mood I’m in. 
 

As an introvert, socializing drains my energy. My alone time “recharges” me. Extroverts are the opposite. & introversion vs. extroversion is actually based on how you recharge, not on “shyness”, as many ignorant people think. There’s actually such things as extroverted introverts/ introverted extroverts. 

The people i’m closest to understand my introverted ways and know I need lots of alone time & they do not take that offensively.

I’m also an INTP on the MBTI. Sounds like you may be, too. INTPs seem shy and aloof to anyone whom the INTP hasn’t deemed “worthy of their time”. If ya don’t pique my interest / you may as well be invisible & you’re a waste of my time/energy. & I DONT CARE if this makes me seem like a b1tch. Super unapologetic for being myself. 

I totally can relate! I cant be at a social gathering for a long time or be around people alot without feeling drained and anxious.

Im happy being at home watching tv while being on here.

Also im similar to u on the MBTI except that im an INFJ

[princessmimi]

On 11/23/2020 at 10:06 PM, NotLouTaylor said:

"Are you shy? You need to be louder and more outspoken. Are you not having fun, is that why you're quiet? You should talk more. Why don't you talk a lot? Are you sad?" 

...I'm so tired of explaining myself to new people I meet. Being quiet does not equal shyness, anti-social or any other 'negative' connotations you might think. The reason I am so quiet is because I just find conversations so exhausing and most of the time it bores me , it's draining my energy 

 

How about you ?

Totally agree!

Thats why I prefer animals/pets cause they accept u for who u really are and dont judge u

[girl_bye]

theres a proverb in my language that goes "even the mother of a deaf kid doesnt understand his words" basically it means you have to speak up to get what you want

my parents used to tell me this all the time cuz i wouldnt speak lol