Open Letter to Britney Spears

[thegrove]

I wish the fanbase would/could like send her all the roses in the world and a huge thank u card for being such a great pop icon and just person ugh 

[super.nova]

I feel the same way as you, this was really done for her fans - and I felt so validated - I think we all felt that connection too, but it was weird to explain.

[electricopop]

That's so heartwarming. Beautifully written. 

[robbie_247]

I always wondered what it was about Britney that made me feel inspired; after all, she is a woman and I was confused with my own gender identity. But there was something about her that I felt reflected a piece of me. Was it the way she moved, how she sang, or the way she maintained her humanity despite commanding such confidence? It couldn't be any of those given that I did not sing or dance, and I certainly did not feel confident. It wasn't until more recently (I'm 33 now) when I realized it was her ability to endure the constant verbal abuse by others (including family) while unwavering in maintaining her authentic self.

I cannot say I was always opposed to the conservatorship. I remember waking up every morning in 2007 fearing that something happened to her, and would skim the news to be assured she was okay. I vividly remember seeing the photo of her dad at the hospital carrying her pink wig and thinking the chaos surrounding her is "finally over." I bought into the lies we now know are not true. We could see, however, that things were not okay after the start of the conservatorship. I thought the necessity to establish the conservatorship would save her from her declining mental health. I now know it was the inverse; the conservatorship was actually causing excruciating pain and psychological anguish. Even when the #FreeBritney movement was gaining momentum, I was doubtful that her safety was actually compromised. At the time, I was doing my PhD in clinical psychology and thought I was more knowledgeable than most with regards to the cause and effect of mental illness. Indeed, my clinical training facilitated my ability to recognize signs and symptoms of abuse and mental illness (respectively). Therefore, I continued to endorse the conservatorship because I wanted Britney to be happy, secure, and (most of all) safe. 

I deeply regret this now. The arrogance I had in being able to recognize mental illness resulted in me believing the conservatorship protected Britney from herself. It was never motivated by a desire to ensure that Britney record or perform ever again. Truly. My intentions were pure. I wanted for her to have the things had come to list in her book that make her happy; to live her life spent surrounded by her children, with a forever-love partner, and to feel safe.

Britney (and her music) carried me through most of challenging times in life by inspiring me to continue to push through moments of feeling great shame, endure challenging workouts, and teaching me how to demonstrate confidence while under a great deal of scrutiny.

I owe Britney so much, and that includes an apology. Therefore, if ever presented with the question “What would you say to her if given the opportunity?” it would likely be: "Britney, I am so sorry."

[Jamesgatsby]

14 hours ago, super.nova said:

I feel the same way as you, this was really done for her fans - and I felt so validated - I think we all felt that connection too, but it was weird to explain.

I completely agree. I’m so glad she feels it too. 

[Jamesgatsby]

13 hours ago, electricopop said:

That's so heartwarming. Beautifully written. 

Thank you! It’s nice to have the outlet. So many emotions after reading the book. 

[Jamesgatsby]

14 hours ago, thegrove said:

I wish the fanbase would/could like send her all the roses in the world and a huge thank u card for being such a great pop icon and just person ugh 

Yes. 🌹🌹🌹🌹

[Heitorzinho]

18 hours ago, Jamesgatsby said:

Forever in her corner,

This sentence made me cry... I feel the same way, and it's a beautiful sentiment. So well written, thank you for this

[icybaby]

I just finished the book and i totally felt the connection. I have to say when she thanked fans for stooding up for her i burst in tears. I totally can see her healing will take a while but i am happy for Britney being free and first time in a decade doing what she wants to do. I think i understand her more now.  That book is a  FU to all of her abusers but also the incredible experience for the people to get into her mind and see things through her perspective.

[Hamelia]

12 hours ago, robbie_247 said:

12 hours ago, robbie_247 said:

At the time, I was doing my PhD in clinical psychology and thought I was more knowledgeable than most with regards to the cause and effect of mental illness. Indeed, my clinical training facilitated my ability to recognize signs and symptoms of abuse and mental illness (respectively). Therefore, I continued to endorse the conservatorship because I wanted Britney to be happy, secure, and (most of all) safe. 

I deeply regret this now. The arrogance I had in being able to recognize mental illness resulted in me believing the conservatorship protected Britney from herself.

I owe Britney so much, and that includes an apology. Therefore, if ever presented with the question “What would you say to her if given the opportunity?” it would likely be: "Britney, I am so sorry."

Did you know it was a probate conservatorship which is inappropriate for people who work regularly?  I am glad you had a wake-up call. In your profession, you may encounter rogue conservators again. I am a late comer to Britney's 'case', and I always thought that her father was the one with the mental illness. 

[super.nova]

2 hours ago, Jamesgatsby said:

Thank you! It’s nice to have the outlet. So many emotions after reading the book. 

yeah. I love that we can just be ourselves here and express our feelings - even tho some ******* idiots have their stupid opinions coming out of their ***** because they don’t know how to be happy 

[robbie_247]

23 hours ago, Hamelia said:

Did you know it was a probate conservatorship which is inappropriate for people who work regularly?  I am glad you had a wake-up call. In your profession, you may encounter rogue conservators again. I am a late comer to Britney's 'case', and I always thought that her father was the one with the mental illness. 

No - I was only 17 when the conservatorship started, and I also do not live in the US. I thought the conservatorship, at that time, was intended to protector from nefarious people. Only well into my PhD did I recognize that maybe it was those currently close to her that adverse affected her wellbeing. There is a photo of her at her wedding that showed her hugging her husband and smiling. It was a smile I hadn't seen in a long time. I remember thinking "that's her, she is still the Britney I grew up loving".

Make no mistake, never did my support for her waiver. I have expressed my support emphatically. It was in those moments where I was alone and reading stories or seeing interviews of her that I had my doubts. But I know that the limits imposed on a person should NEVER be intended to be permanent, but to support their return to live independently.