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Is it bad to feel like you are frustrated with your life?


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I relapsed. I feel horrible. About to be homeless on the street. I've gotta be honest with you not because you think I should. I needed to do this for myself. 

Drugs and alcohol have controlled me for 11 horrible years. I miss my mom and my dad, my aunt's and uncles they all have already died because of drugs and alcohol. It runs in my blood. I'm Native American and it's hard because my family is very wealthy and they don't see my worth or they see it but they don't care. The harsh reality is people don't care..

We gotta learn to care for ourselves. 

I want to say that Exhale has been the ONLY thing I've had that makes me feel seen heard and loved.  Thank you for this community. You have been my family and I'm literally crying as I type this...

😔❤️❤️

God bless you all.  I don't know what's gonna happen to me. I tried for six months to do good on my own but I really think I need help....I just hate rehabs and church's and programs where you are controlled and me being non -binary and gay, also an addict and struggling with depression and anxiety. I just feel judged. I just need to find my place in the world.  

You all help me in a way I may not say. There's some amazing people on here. 

I also want to apologize for any of the times I was rude to any user or out of line.

Have a blessed day 

 

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I really feel your pain about rehabs and church groups. Some of those groups have ulterior motives, which must trigger your addictions more when you feel like you cannot fit in, especially when it comes to ***uality. 

Be sure to forgive yourself, love yourself and keep telling yourself that you are strong enough to overcome this. Avoid locations that "trigger" your addictions (stores/areas you used to buy from or use in). 

Do you have a therapist? I know it can be costly. If you have health insurance, check with your insurance provider to see if they can help you find a list of therapists. That can at least be a starting point? Is there a sober-living facility in your area that is not too controlling/religious?

It's easy to suggest things, but what's practical for your situation and the area you live in is another thing entirely. I wish you best and hope you can find resources. The USA is a tough place right now for finding help. It's a patchwork of places that ship you around to other agencies/nonprofits/rehabs/etc. because no place seems to be properly funded to provide full care. Best of luck to you and stay strong! 

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38 minutes ago, Garrett James said:

I can't speak on addiction for myself but my big sister is a recovering alcoholic and my older brother died of a drug od months ago so i can imagine it's a hard thing to overcome. :tifftear_miss_ny_new_york_ms_crying_wipe_tears_sad: so sad the world lost Aaron Carter & Whitney to addiction.

 

Sad Schitts Creek GIF by CBC

Yes it's so sad to hear about Aaron's passing. He has similar struggles to .mine and seemed like he had a good heart. ❤️🥺

Also I'm sorry for the loss of your family members. It takes time to heal past mourning. 

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7 hours ago, Slayer said:

I really hope you get help Jay, you did amazing being sober for six months! You can do it again, it shows you can do it! It is no impossible.

Stay positive and take it one day at a time, get through a day at a time - that is an achievement in itself. Don't give up!

Slayer that is so kind of you to say. You are always so supportive and kind! Thank you for these kind words. I am gonna more than likely hopefully Lord willing will be getting back into program life.

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4 hours ago, GlitterRain said:

So sorry you’re going through so much pain. Sending you my love and all of the positive vibes. Take one day at a time and know that you have so much support on Exhale! I believe  in you and am proud of you for being so open an honest. You’re an inspiration 🤍

Sending you a big hug Season 10 Hug GIF by Friends

Thanks for calling me inspiring and brave. I appreciate that. People feel like we are alone sometimes there's not a voice for the broken. Sharing my struggles is my way of being transparent, in hopes of bettering someone else's life, I need to focus on my life. 

Not a easy thing for me but nothing is impossible. It's about mindset. I just need to learn how to walk past this.

Love you and thanks for responding. ❤️🌸

 

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