Have you ever winded/wound yourself up?

[Micce_InBut Black Out]

I must confess i did

in 2007

i did many ***** and thought i will finally see Jesus and heaven

but  there was this momeny of clarity i called my Finnish friends from Salvation army

after that i thought id go deaf

but my herring came back

i think my hearing got lost a little though but it might be it slowly came back all the way

don't wind yourself up that often as 1 time in life people

[Micce_InBut Black Out]

the moment of clarity after intaking a bunch of ***** in a toilet that now doesn't even exist felt like- i felt like super awake and had a premonition i'd fade out

i was in orphanage first time going to first aid what was just around the corner the first aid woman laughed about me and thought i am faking something and made an injection to the butt. i just said i feel bad etc

and then after some hours when the social worker in orphanage was still awake i confessed that i tried to do suicide

she asked: "why didn't you tell it to me right away earlier"

brilliant moments like this

of course back then i was even disgusted that the first aid member who thought i was trolling and i remember she was super mean and arrogant, made a injection to the ***, which was probably a placebo injection

i have cursed first aid ever since