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3 hours ago, FreeBritBrit said:

To all of you ****posting- call this s uicide line. I did, the one in my country. The guy told me to become a trashman or  go in se x work if it's so hard to find a job in my field. Then I shut down the telephone and smacked the bottle of sedatives.

OMG we both know most people here (Balkans) are idiots, but we should know better than to be affected by them

 

3 hours ago, FreeBritBrit said:

I'm nobody, and just a burden but a burden horrified of ending it all because I don't want to end up in hell for s uicide.

I don't know you, nor your situation, but from what I can tell you are funny and smart and I believe you are here for a reason.

I often feel the same way and have suicidal thoughts (I myself don't believe in hell, but I am scared of ending up living like a plant!) so I'm not going to be hypocritical and tell you about the beauty of life, but I beg you don't focus on the negativity. I'm sure there is at least one person that would miss you and be hurt if you end up doing this

 

Dm me if you need to talk :hugs_madonna_britney_ftr_2008_circus_hugging_friends_support:

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Even if you don’t want to reach out to a therapist or talk yet, you have a whole community online who’re here to support you through this phase and believe it me, it is a phase. I’ve personally seen a close friend go through this and they’ve really pulled through and I see them today being happier than ever. I want to see that for you. We’re all here for you! 

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Please try to find something to enjoy. Anything. You never know what life has in store for you. Maybe in 2,5 or even 10 years, you'll think about what you went through and be so proud of how strong you became. Please don't give up. ❤️

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I remember reading such a text and what came after was not good.

Try viewing everything from different angle. Drop anything that is not necessary or what is considered so by someone else. Seek therapy and healing try to love and respect yourself. Start with small things and be proud about it. Know that you are not alone. Never give up!

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Stop everything and film go for a run. The endorphins will make u feel a bit better. Meet new people, chat with strangers... I find that easier than talking with friends or family members who can judge you. Grab a book, go to the beach or a hike. 

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As someone who suffers from Bi-polar disorder, depression, anxiety, and has struggled with addiction, I can certainly relate. I don't know you, or your story, but I am absolutely here to talk if you ever need. Sometimes, even the things you mentioned such as getting out of bed, getting dressed, etc., can feel impossible and daunting. I have been there. I myself have been to a point before where I felt the only option was to end my life. I don't want to say it is all going to get better for you, but I do want to say that you are not the things you tell yourself you are, nor that others may have told you. You are so much more, and you, and your life are important, meaningful, and worth it my friend, even if you cannot see it now. The strength it takes to do what you did, and reach out admitting how you are feeling, that is incredible. Please don't give up. You have a community here at least that will rally around you and be here for you in any way we can. Love, and good vibes your way. Please don't hesitate to reach out, we got you boo!

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@FreeBritBrit, sis, I know words typed on a forum might not mean much or, if they do, they may seem insignificant enough to ignore or not take seriously. But do know that there are people here rooting for you and are here for you.

Life has been tough for so many. For some, it’s been recent and for others it may seem like every season of life has been shadowed by a dark cloud. Pain, suffering, despair, and so on.

But, know this: the sun will always shine. :howiroll_beyonce_telling_talking_chatting_preaching_white_shirt_hands: And it shines on you as it shines on us all. If pain and suffering exist, then their opposites must also exist: joy, pleasure, contentment, hope, well-being. I don’t say this to erase your pain or suffering, but to suggest that their converses exist in you as well. Acknowledging the pain you have experienced is a form of strength and vulnerability in and of itself.

Sending you a virtual hug from afar. :hugs_madonna_britney_ftr_2008_circus_hugging_friends_support:

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I have read this topic yesterday and for some reason had to think about it all day long. @FreeBritBrit, if some weird stranger like me is thinking about how you're feeling right now, there are plenty of people that would love to have you in their lives. Self hate is a b1tch, I have felt it for most time of my life and so I know how you feel and why you percieve yourself like you do right now. It makes us experience the negative things in life even worse and keeps us from seeing everything else around us. I really wish you the best, life is not easy, but it is possible to feel differently.

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Short update:

 

That night yeah, I did something stupid but one sweet member was with me the whole time on another platform. The next day, I slept through it all.

 

I went to the doc. (psychiatrist) today and he started talking about God and if He exists why I'm in this state.

It went on an on. Just religious ranting, nothing about me and why I came. He said- even I wouldn't employ you. You look like death and you seem fat.

Look at yourself, your poor dad, nothing can save you.

He asked some pretty odd questions s exuality wise and then did (stupid, unneded) anegote how a guy came on his door with his mom because his mom was worried her son is gay. And he replied - oh he is gay (hrv/srp- homic)

I'm not gay,  but still I dont plan on revealing my private info to such creep. Also, making fun and re-telling stories how you ''spotted a gay'' is ****ed up.

 

And at the end of the thing he said- if you ever feel the worst- s uicide is not a sin. He did mention s uicide through the conversation alot as an option for lost people.

 

I only plan to reveraal his identity to one member i'm already in contact with, and we are chatting outside this site. No one else on this it.

 

See you, hopefully. And thanks nice replies!

 

 

I reported him to the doctor chamber but I don't plan to press any charges.  I cried a lot when I was done with him to the point random woman in the streets (had cute Bosnian accept) came to me and hugged me.

Also, I realize I'm too old to sleep with my dad because of age but I'm horrified I'll repeat something stupid and I hate being alone in my room. But he is old and we manage somehow. Only complains is- I cry a lot and wet his pajama shirt.

 

 

 

 

 

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28 minutes ago, FreeBritBrit said:

Short update:

 

That night yeah, I did something stupid but one sweet member was with me the whole time on another platform. The next day, I slept through it all.

 

I went to the doc. (psychiatrist) today and he started talking about God and if He exists why I'm in this state.

It went on an on. Just religious ranting, nothing about me and why I came. He said- even I wouldn't employ you. You look like death and you seem fat.

Look at yourself, your poor dad, nothing can save you.

He asked some pretty odd questions s exuality wise and then did (stupid, unneded) anegote how a guy came on his door with his mom because his mom was worried her son is gay. And he replied - oh he is gay (hrv/srp- homic)

I'm not gay,  but still I dont plan on revealing my private info to such creep. Also, making fun and re-telling stories how you ''spotted a gay'' is ****ed up.

 

And at the end of the thing he said- if you ever feel the worst- s uicide is not a sin. He did mention s uicide through the conversation alot as an option for lost people.

 

I only plan to reversal his identity to one member i'm already in contact with, and we are chatting outside this site. No one else on this it.

 

See you, hopefully. And thanks nice replies!

 

 

I reported him to the doctor chamber but I don't plan to press any charges.  I cried a lot when I was done with him to the point random woman in the streets (had cute Bosnian accept) came to me and hugged me.

Also, I realize I'm too old to sleep with my dad because of age but I'm horrified I'll repeat something stupid and I hate being alone in my room. But he is old and we manage somehow. Only complains is- I cry a lot and wet his pajama shirt.

 

 

 

 

 

Monsters Inc Hug GIF

You need to get busy. I completely agree with Jordan: try going to the gym.

Whenever I've lost the kick I usually go to the barber's for a fresh haircut, start watching failarmy videos, go for a walk listening to Enya, call my family and my friends, plan a short trip or eat something sweet. 

Find a new hobby, join a sports club, listen to Jordan Peterson's book. It had quite the impact on me.

Take on any of these measures and try tackling it like a challenge. 

One thing's for sure though: there's still plenty of sparkle in you, otherwise you wouldn't have been able to find the necessary energy to report your doctor. 

There's still reason for you to be here. Some words of wisdom from someone dear to me:

Not every day is horrible, just today... 

 

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