How Britney changed my life.

[Justaboy]

I always have been a  big fan of Britney ever since she burst into music scene. But for me , she became my idol during/ after 2007. I just thought like many others " if she can go through such an scrutiny in front of the world, I can do it as well.". 

I obviously was not and still a public figure . But its the family; family that makes you feel worthless and insecure. There was a time when I was house bound with my phone taken away, not able to see any of my friends or have any form of contact with the outer world. The time when  my own uncle would have a "meeting" with me every morning with my sister and mother in loud speaker asking question such as " So what percentage gay are you today?"  . When I got upset and angry he would turn it against me telling everyone " see , he has anger issues. He is dangerous". All I did was not answer to him but was visibly frustrated and angry. It became our morning ritual. He told everyone I was a **** addict and not to be trusted ( I wasn't  **** addict. But he managed to get my medical record from my doctor pretending to be me and the report showed that I had tried to commit suicide few months ago by overdosing on tablets). Everyone believed him because he controlled the narrative, my narrative. So I lost all my self confidence ( I was always very vibrant and confident person). As a human , when you are taken away of your basic rights , you have no idea how it feels. At first, you fight , you retaliate  , you reason but in the end you give up. And that's what I did. I gave up. I was living in his house as his slave. Guests who came over used to think I was his maid/cook. And these guests were relatives who knew me. But they were silent because this uncle had so much power over everyone. 

One day, I thought of Britney. I thought "if Britney is so strong to live through this and still be so brave , I can do this as well" ( mind you  we are talking 5 years back when we didn't know the extent of her situation). So one night I ran away to a different city with £10 in my pocket. I was homeless but thankfully had used part of that money to buy data. I joined Chefs UK page on Fb and started replying to any jobs posted. Luckily someone replied and wanted to interview me. I got the job and never looked back. Now am happily married with a child  and running my own food business and couldn't be any happier. 

How did this all happen? Because of Britney. I don't identify myself as gay or bi because only male relationship I had was my ex. But for my uncle to hack  my emails and see my emails exchange with my ex or read my text messages and started using that info against me, it made me feel so small.

And you know the worst part? Him and his brothers used to ***aully abuse me when  I was a kid. 

But Britney has always taught me to look for positive. She is the epitome of strength and bravery. These days , I am so proud to tell everyone that am a Britney fan without feeling judged. And I don't care even if am judged. 

[GirlOnTheMoon]

I’m sorry you had to go through that. No one deserves to be treated like that by their family and no one deserves to feel like that. I am so sorry.

I’ve always loved Britney. I knew all the songs even though back then I didn’t know English lol. My parents took me to her first concert in Miami (Leslie Cárter was opening for her!) and I remember seeing her so close - I couldn’t believe she was a real human (keep in mind I was about 8 years lol). She’s always been a part of my life but it wasn’t until 2008 that I started seeing her in a different light. It stopped being about the music and it became more about her as a person, about her strength, her resilience, her passion, her love for freedom, her dissonance with Hollywood - it all made her more real. I was also going through a dark period in my life and I remember all I wanted was to end my life, but in Britney I saw hope (not that I looked at her as God) but more as in her life, her struggles, her anxieties are SO MUCH bigger than mine and yet she is pushing through one day at a time.

Ever since then, her humanity has been more important to me than her music. I just want to see her happy, free and living her life for herself.

[Vivianka]

That's so sweet !!!!

[Justaboy]

30 minutes ago, GirlOnTheMoon said:

I’m sorry you had to go through that. No one deserves to be treated like that by their family and no one deserves to feel like that. I am so sorry.

I’ve always loved Britney. I knew all the songs even though back then I didn’t know English lol. My parents took me to her first concert in Miami (Leslie Cárter was opening for her!) and I remember seeing her so close - I couldn’t believe she was a real human (keep in mind I was about 8 years lol). She’s always been a part of my life but it wasn’t until 2008 that I started seeing her in a different light. It stopped being about the music and it became more about her as a person, about her strength, her resilience, her passion, her love for freedom, her dissonance with Hollywood - it all made her more real. I was also going through a dark period in my life and I remember all I wanted was to end my life, but in Britney I saw hope (not that I looked at her as God) but more as in her life, her struggles, her anxieties are SO MUCH bigger than mine and yet she is pushing through one day at a time.

Ever since then, her humanity has been more important to me than her music. I just want to see her happy, free and living her life for herself.

Honestly, thank you for sharing this. I couldn't have worded better than you. 

And am truly sorry that you went through the similar experience. Nobody deserves that. But am glad that you are in a better place now. Keep the strength going.

Britney doesn't get the credit she deserves. Even in her darkest moments, she was inspiring  people. 

[Justaboy]

30 minutes ago, redrose said:

That's so sweet !!!!

I have always felt like this is a space environment/space where you can tell your darkest secrets and be the most vulnerable yourself and no-one will judge you. 

Exhale has now evolved into a community than just a forum. 

 

Thank you @jordanmiller 

[Vivianka]

4 minutes ago, BigDadyy said:

I have always felt like this is a space environment/space where you can tell your darkest secrets and be the most vulnerable yourself and no-one will judge you. 

Exhale has now evolved into a community than just a forum. 

 

Thank you @jordanmiller 

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment !!!!

[Matou]

I'm so sorry for what happened to you I didn't know if I should love your post or not because parts you've written can't be loved but I love it for your courage to tell your story. Seriously I have tears because I can imagine that ... someone really close endure traumas, rights taken away, no privacy, threats & I have seen how the system is corrupt.

There is as much bad as good in this world and it's a constent fight. Your story looks "similar" to Britney for me, you know what I mean.

And finally you have seen the light (Godney) and saw Jesus (sorry I have to write this )

And I don't care even if am judged. => THIS ! A lot of people are stuck in that circle of thinking what others think but **** that **** !

 

[Justaboy]

4 hours ago, Matou said:

I'm so sorry for what happened to you I didn't know if I should love your post or not because parts you've written can't be loved but I love it for your courage to tell your story. Seriously I have tears because I can imagine that ... someone really close endure traumas, rights taken away, no privacy, threats & I have seen how the system is corrupt.

There is as much bad as good in this world and it's a constent fight. Your story looks "similar" to Britney for me, you know what I mean.

And finally you have seen the light (Godney) and saw Jesus (sorry I have to write this )

And I don't care even if am judged. => THIS ! A lot of people are stuck in that circle of thinking what others think but **** that **** !

 

I  truly appreciate your honesty. Thank you for being so supportive and kind.

[Justaboy]

4 hours ago, redrose said:

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment !!!!

And honestly I have this forum to come to if I ever feel down. Everyone is so funny , it lightens up my day.

[BritneyMiley]

I send you all my love! This is what really means to be Britney fans: she always inspires us with her strength and her music. I love her so much too, lately she is really giving me all the strength to become a more secure and independent person and I can relate to her so much, I swear. I love her ❤️❤️❤️

Thank you for sharing your story