Jump to content

They want a date,I want a hookup (advice plss)


Recommended Posts

So I have been chatting with some person for a week now,and at first we agreed to hookup and have fun. And I have told them that I just got out of relationship,and am not looking for anything serious. And they have agreed on it at first.

But now they have become kinda clingy,starting to call me,giving me relationship nicknames(baby,honey,love etc.),talking about our love in future etc.

I am supposed to meet them in few days,but idk if I should do it or not. Because it seems that I can't explain it to them that I just wanna hookup,aka have a *** combination for time being (smth they agreed on at first).

So idk if I should continue with this or just end it.

Any advice my fellow Exhalers.

 

 

Also I  kinda don't want to end it,because Satan knows when I will find a another semi attractive hookup again.

Link to comment
  • Replies 36
  • Created
  • Last Reply
  • Super Mods

End it. End it fast.

Gay men usually go only two ways:

Desperate for validation and getting it through ***

Desperate for validation and getting it through relationships

Both are equally unhealthy.

The first one makes you feel empty because all you do is jump from a guy to a guy leaving you emotionless.

The second one makes you feel miserable because all you want is love but you want it now, immediately, which causes everything to fall apart.

And once in a million, you will find a normal gay who can balance things and has emotional maturity of an adult person, not of an 8 year old child. :) 

Link to comment
13 minutes ago, BUWYGF said:

End it. End it fast.

Gay men usually go only two ways:

Desperate for validation and getting it through ***

Desperate for validation and getting it through relationships

Both are equally unhealthy.

The first one makes you feel empty because all you do is jump from a guy to a guy leaving you emotionless.

The second one makes you feel miserable because all you want is love but you want it now, immediately, which causes everything to fall apart.

And once in a million, you will find a normal gay who can balance things and has emotional maturity of an adult person, not of an 8 year old child. :) 

Thanks for advice bb.

Yeah my biggest fear they will become hella crazy due to their feelings. And will start to stalk me and expose me to my family.

 

I have accepted myself as a bi guy. And I just got out if relationship with a girl. It was bad and toxic for almost a year. And she still doesn't want to end it completely.

But no one knows I have feelings for guys to. And I live in such a religious,small town that my life could actually be ruined due to gay rumors alone.

Hence why I haven't been with a guy since 2017 when I actually lived outside if my country for a little bit.

 

So my biggest fear is,I will go and hookup with him. And then I will end it in near future. And he will go all psycho on me because he got his feelings hurt. And on top of everything I don't wanna hurt his feelings.

Link to comment
  • Super Mods
3 hours ago, Easy There said:

Thanks for advice bb.

Yeah my biggest fear they will become hella crazy due to their feelings. And will start to stalk me and expose me to my family.

 

I have accepted myself as a bi guy. And I just got out if relationship with a girl. It was bad and toxic for almost a year. And she still doesn't want to end it completely.

But no one knows I have feelings for guys to. And I live in such a religious,small town that my life could actually be ruined due to gay rumors alone.

Hence why I haven't been with a guy since 2017 when I actually lived outside if my country for a little bit.

 

So my biggest fear is,I will go and hookup with him. And then I will end it in near future. And he will go all psycho on me because he got his feelings hurt. And on top of everything I don't wanna hurt his feelings.

I think your biggest and best solution here would be to move out to a bigger city or country, this should solve most of your dating issues :mhm_britney_nodding_yes_mhmm:

Link to comment
  • Content Curators

I think he just might be trying to push the boundaries with you to see what reaction he gets, I guess he just might wanna see if he can make you fall in love with him.

However if your not down all the way you should definitetly end it.

It's hard for gays to find love and if your in a small town that narrows it down even further so hes probably excited to be with you.

My advice, I think you should just date women unless your planning on leaving the town where your from, people can be so jugdemental and I think it would bring you peace. I mean you like women anyway so it won't be hard.

I wanna be there when you touch fire

Link to comment

Even If you’re just looking for a NSA hook up, I would still recommend going on a coffee date first so you can get a feel for the vibe and gauge if you’re on the same page. 

Follow your instincts and have fun. But also please be safe - you never know who you could be meeting. If you’re feeling a bit weird about it then absolutely cut it off. Remember you don’t owe anyone anything on these apps (I’m assuming you’re talking on a dating app?)

Hope that kinda helps!


 

 

Link to comment

There are three sides to every story. Your side, their side and the truth. How long has this charade been going on? If you truly just want a hook up, then hasn't it happened? I have to wonder if you are giving this person any clues or signs that this could be more than NSA.

No strings attached is just that. No names, no numbers and no fathers/mothers aka family. 

200.gif?cid=31ad6aa7o9dpi9y18l21kxz25x02

Link to comment
2 hours ago, Jordan Miller said:

:well_cookie_monster_point_blue_black:

It's the respectful thing to do. You're sparing them much more hurt down the road. 🙏 

 

1 hour ago, Midnight said:

I think he just might be trying to push the boundaries with you to see what reaction he gets, I guess he just might wanna see if he can make you fall in love with him.

However if your not down all the way you should definitetly end it.

It's hard for gays to find love and if your in a small town that narrows it down even further so hes probably excited to be with you.

My advice, I think you should just date women unless your planning on leaving the town where your from, people can be so jugdemental and I think it would bring you peace. I mean you like women anyway so it won't be hard.

 

54 minutes ago, nwonder said:

Even If you’re just looking for a NSA hook up, I would still recommend going on a coffee date first so you can get a feel for the vibe and gauge if you’re on the same page. 

Follow your instincts and have fun. But also please be safe - you never know who you could be meeting. If you’re feeling a bit weird about it then absolutely cut it off. Remember you don’t owe anyone anything on these apps (I’m assuming you’re talking on a dating app?)

Hope that kinda helps!


 

 

 

26 minutes ago, Invitation said:

Just end it before things get ugly.

You seem to have a lot more to lose for this hookup.

Thanks guys.

Link to comment
19 minutes ago, ColdAsFire88 said:

There are three sides to every story. Your side, their side and the truth. How long has this charade been going on? If you truly just want a hook up, then hasn't it happened? I have to wonder if you are giving this person any clues or signs that this could be more than NSA.

No strings attached is just that. No names, no numbers and no fathers/mothers aka family. 

200.gif?cid=31ad6aa7o9dpi9y18l21kxz25x02

Literally a week lol. My car is in the shop,he lives an hour away from me in another city. So I need my car to get there. We were planning to see each other on Sunday. 

Also he doesn't live alone so we were planning to do it in the car.

But its starting to be word because he is becoming clingy after,and is starting to act like we are about to date. Even though I told him I want *** combination force time being.

 

Link to comment
  • Super Mods
58 minutes ago, nwonder said:

Even If you’re just looking for a NSA hook up, I would still recommend going on a coffee date first so you can get a feel for the vibe and gauge if you’re on the same page. 

Follow your instincts and have fun. But also please be safe - you never know who you could be meeting. If you’re feeling a bit weird about it then absolutely cut it off. Remember you don’t owe anyone anything on these apps (I’m assuming you’re talking on a dating app?)

Hope that kinda helps!


 

 

King of good advice :tysm_beyonce_thanks_wow_gratitude_love_you_ily:

Link to comment

Does he know where you live? Do you have him on any of your social media? And is he an openly bi/gay man?

Cuz I feel like if he doesn't have access to any of your personal info, he won't have access to anyone "out" you to. And if he's closeted, then I think he might have a level of empathy not to try anything malicious since he's in the same boat as you. If this is all the case I say break it off. You set your limits and defined exactly what you were willing to offer him. If he wants to break that agreement, than you shouldnt have to feel obligated to continue into something you didnt sign up for.

 

 

Good luck boo!

Link to comment
On 3/4/2021 at 3:43 AM, BUWYGF said:

End it. End it fast.

Gay men usually go only two ways:

Desperate for validation and getting it through ***

Desperate for validation and getting it through relationships

Both are equally unhealthy.

The first one makes you feel empty because all you do is jump from a guy to a guy leaving you emotionless.

The second one makes you feel miserable because all you want is love but you want it now, immediately, which causes everything to fall apart.

And once in a million, you will find a normal gay who can balance things and has emotional maturity of an adult person, not of an 8 year old child. :) 

Chile you stay slandering the gays :gloria_falling_stairs_trip::sendinglove_kissing_heart_love_blowing:

Link to comment
On 3/4/2021 at 2:23 PM, GMFlop said:

Block them. 

 

On 3/4/2021 at 3:26 PM, BUWYGF said:

I think your biggest and best solution here would be to move out to a bigger city or country, this should solve most of your dating issues :mhm_britney_nodding_yes_mhmm:

 

On 3/4/2021 at 4:03 PM, Jordan Miller said:

:well_cookie_monster_point_blue_black:

It's the respectful thing to do. You're sparing them much more hurt down the road. 🙏 

 

On 3/4/2021 at 5:04 PM, Midnight said:

I think he just might be trying to push the boundaries with you to see what reaction he gets, I guess he just might wanna see if he can make you fall in love with him.

However if your not down all the way you should definitetly end it.

It's hard for gays to find love and if your in a small town that narrows it down even further so hes probably excited to be with you.

My advice, I think you should just date women unless your planning on leaving the town where your from, people can be so jugdemental and I think it would bring you peace. I mean you like women anyway so it won't be hard.

 

On 3/4/2021 at 5:49 PM, nwonder said:

Even If you’re just looking for a NSA hook up, I would still recommend going on a coffee date first so you can get a feel for the vibe and gauge if you’re on the same page. 

Follow your instincts and have fun. But also please be safe - you never know who you could be meeting. If you’re feeling a bit weird about it then absolutely cut it off. Remember you don’t owe anyone anything on these apps (I’m assuming you’re talking on a dating app?)

Hope that kinda helps!


 

 

 

On 3/4/2021 at 6:17 PM, Invitation said:

Just end it before things get ugly.

You seem to have a lot more to lose for this hookup.

 

On 3/4/2021 at 7:15 PM, VCTR said:

I vote you go hook up with him and then, plot twist, you go all crazy psycho on HIM and ruin his life. Then he’ll be all “oh heck no!” And leave you you alone. 
 

Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. 

 

On 3/4/2021 at 10:54 PM, SloppyToppyGoddess said:

Does he know where you live? Do you have him on any of your social media? And is he an openly bi/gay man?

Cuz I feel like if he doesn't have access to any of your personal info, he won't have access to anyone "out" you to. And if he's closeted, then I think he might have a level of empathy not to try anything malicious since he's in the same boat as you. If this is all the case I say break it off. You set your limits and defined exactly what you were willing to offer him. If he wants to break that agreement, than you shouldnt have to feel obligated to continue into something you didnt sign up for.

 

 

Good luck boo!

 

On 3/5/2021 at 5:07 AM, limezd said:

Hit the block button sister. 
 

if you just want a hook up, go on Squirt and see who’s cruising the forests and park in your area. I heard it works 8/10 times.  :britdrown_britney_tears_crying_drown_ink_black:

 

On 3/5/2021 at 4:25 PM, Brat said:

Is this about you and Jordan? :akii_kylie_jenner_makeup_brush_lol_laugh_haha_hehe_lmao:

 

On 3/6/2021 at 12:15 AM, thebritmaster said:

Chile you stay slandering the gays :gloria_falling_stairs_trip::sendinglove_kissing_heart_love_blowing:

Thanks you guys.

I decided to end it.

 

But I did one worst thing. I hooked up with my ex. And now she wants to get back.

Link to comment

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...

We noticed you're using an ad blocker  :ehum_britney_um_unsure_confused_what:

Thanks for visiting Exhale! Your support is greatly appreciated 💜  

Exhale survives through advertising revenue. Please, disable your ad block extension to help us and continue browsing Exhale. 🙏

I've disabled ad block