My Embarrassing Britney Confession

[LostInAnImage]

I know these threads pop-up with relative frequently, but they are always quite amusing; further, I have always failed to have a real “flop fan moment” to contribute. 

However, my older sister just came to get me for breakfast, and heard me listening to “Gimme More.” She only knows the lyrics secondary to that which I blasted through my freaking boombox () for years, and/or loudly sang-a-long with next to our adjoining walls, so suffice it to say I think she knows my sing-a-long interpretations better than Britney’s actual lyrics.

So anyway, when GM was playing, my sister was “singing along” by mumbling somethings about how “we didn’t see that one coming, what with Britney Spears and her neverending litany of ‘unstoppable danger.’”

I had completely forgotten until just now, whenever I actually audIbly heard my sister’s interpretation of my initial fallacious interpretation, that whenever BO first debuted, I had absolutely no idea the producer’s name was Danja. Thus, I always thought that particular line was referring to all the actual physical danger surrounding her on a daily basis, like the controversies about her children sitting in her lap without car seats and the insanity of the daily paparazzi car chases. 

I always thought it was so ballsy (and slightly sociopathic...) for her to call herself legendary within the very same outro wherein she essentially calls herself an unrepentant menace upon society, only further taunting the public/law enforcement by saying, “it doesn’t matter how unstoppably dangerous I am; you’re gonna have to remove me, cause I ain’t going nowhere.”

Anyway, all that was cleared up a few years later when I finally realized what exactly a) a producer was, and b) that “Danja” was a pseudonym for the producer on the record, not a colloquial pronunciation of “danger.”  But regardless, this long-forgotten misunderstanding definitely made me blush a bit today, especially since back then I was teaching some of the lyrics to a couple of foreign exchange girls in dance class who didn’t speak English as well. 

Anyway Exhale, it’s now time for your embarrassing (or simply idiotic) Britney-related snafus.

[luckynine]

When i was 13 my father caught me in the living room doing the matm routine while the music video was playing 

i wanted to disappear!

[I'mNotTheAverageLady]

I also thought first that SHE is the "unstoppable danger"

Now I have to listen to Gimme More ahh

[Dripping For Britney]

This is a good basis for a college essay 

[LostInAnImage]

18 minutes ago, luckynine said:

When i was 13 my father caught me in the living room doing the matm routine while the music video was playing 

i wanted to disappear!

Hah that reminds me, I used to have this VHS (yikes) called “Darren’s Dance Beats.” Darren was supposedly a choreographer for Britney and *NSYNC (don’t know as to the veracity of that claim, however, since I’d never heard of him again outside of my As-Seen-On-TV purchase). 

But anyway, I recall him teaching the “Crazy” and “Bye Bye Bye” MV choreo on that tape, chairography and all for the former. But what I remember most vividly was that he was clearly unaware that nearly all of Nsync’s fans were prepubescent girls at that time; otherwise, I don’t think he would’ve been teaching us how to gyrate our pelvis and thwomp our invisible packages forward. 

[b42ad]

My husband thought that part said “the incredible line goes ‘more more m-m-m-m-more”, not The Incredible Laigo 

[LostInAnImage]

18 minutes ago, I'mNotTheAverageLady said:

I also thought first that SHE is the "unstoppable danger"

Now I have to listen to Gimme More ahh

I feel so much better now, knowing I wasn’t the only one singing about my favorite artist and her unstoppable level of danger. 

[LostInAnImage]

12 minutes ago, Brad Adamson said:

My husband thought that part said “the incredible line goes ‘more more m-m-m-m-more”, not The Incredible Laigo 

Well, I guess I’m 0-2 today, because despite having bought BO the day it came out, and listening to it nonstop ever since, I’ve still never managed to hear (either of) those parts, haha. Is “the incredible lago” pretty clear, or layered under tons of other vocals and effects? 

ETA: Ohh okay I at least know exactly what part you’re referring to, but I never had ANY idea what was being said there! Whenever singing alone, that’s when I’d take a cue from Miss Britney and just mime. 

[Chaoscontrol]

Don't feel and @LostInAnImage, I sang for years too 'the unstoppable danger'. I actually thought that was Britney's voice with male like effects

i have some flop confessions, let me think and I'll get back to ya'll  

[luckynine]

25 minutes ago, LostInAnImage said:

Hah that reminds me, I used to have this VHS (yikes) called “Darren’s Dance Beats.” Darren was supposedly a choreographer for Britney and *NSYNC (don’t know as to the veracity of that claim, however, since I’d never heard of him again outside of my As-Seen-On-TV purchase). 

But anyway, I recall him teaching the “Crazy” and “Bye Bye Bye” MV choreo on that tape, chairography and all for the former. But what I remember most vividly was that he was clearly unaware that nearly all of Nsync’s fans were prepubescent girls at that time; otherwise, I don’t think he would’ve been teaching us how to gyrate our pelvis and thwomp our invisible packages forward. 

Lol 

the delusion

[Tetris]

I once accidentally said Blackout was her 6th album to another stan and then had to be corrected. 

[BKSTYL3]

37 minutes ago, LostInAnImage said:

Darren was supposedly a choreographer for Britney and *NSYNC (don’t know as to the veracity of that claim, however, since I’d never heard of him again outside of my As-Seen-On-TV purchase). 

Darrens Dance Grooves and he knew he was teach us how to gyrate.

He was on her Making the Video for Crazy, Oops, and N*Syncs Bye, bye, bye

 

[LostInAnImage]

10 minutes ago, Tetris said:

I once accidentally said Blackout was her 6th album to another stan and then had to be corrected. 

I notice you have (an adorable!) M&G pic within Britney there...she wasn’t by any chance the “fan” who corrected you, was she?  God, can you imagine? THAT would be hard to live down. You, the fan, are nervous out of your mind trying desperately not to say the wrong thing: Meanwhile, Britney’s like:

[ZAM9315]

53 minutes ago, luckynine said:

When i was 13 my father caught me in the living room doing the matm routine while the music video was playing 

i wanted to disappear!

[LostInAnImage]

1 minute ago, BKSTYL3 said:

Darrens Dance Grooves and he knew he was teach us how to gyrate.

He was on her Making the Video for Crazy, Oops, and N*Syncs Bye, bye, bye

 

Oh no kidding, thanks! Then I guess this was just another flop moment for me, ha. I mean, I’ve obviously seen all these behind-the-video episodes, etc, in the past, but rarely rewatch since my childhood. Now I’ll occasionally watch this kind of stuff here and there for nostalgic factors.

Welp, glad my $20 VHS teaching little girls to pelvic thrust was at least legitimate! 

[BKSTYL3]

For the longest time i thought Kill the lights lyrics were:

"If youre feeling fraudulent"

Instead of 

'If youre feeling froggy leap"

I was singing it out loud and my friend was like "wtf did u just say?"

Now that song reminds me of joanne the scammer

[Tetris]

1 minute ago, LostInAnImage said:

I notice you have (an adorable!) M&G pic within Britney there...she wasn’t by any chance the “fan” who corrected you, was she?  God, can you imagine? THAT would be hard to live down. You, the fan, are nervous out of your mind trying desperately not to say the wrong thing: Meanwhile, Britney’s like:

Thanks! Haha no, this was with a friend at least a year before I met her. 

He’s a songwriter/musician and was saying he thinks he has 6 albums in him. So I was like, “Perfect - then you’ll finish on your Blackout. Flawless way to go out.”

And he was like, “...I mean, I appreciate the reference and like where you’re coming from, but Blackout was actually her 5th album.”

[LostInAnImage]

27 minutes ago, BKSTYL3 said:

For the longest time i thought Kill the lights lyrics were:

"If youre feeling fraudulent"

Instead of 

'If youre feeling froggy leap"

I was singing it out loud and my friend was like "wtf did u just say?"

Now that song reminds me of joanne the scammer

Well to be fair, Britney has a very individualistic style of pronunciation in general, and it’s definitely exacerbated the more autotune/vocoder/whatever is added on top. Like, I still can’t understand a damn word homegirl says in “Mannequin.” And I even went to the Circus Tour! Nevertheless, still can’t so much as formulate a guess as to what the song could possibly be about. Similarly, KTL is VERY edited and highly processed, it sounds kind of like a robot and a human conceived a really beautiful and talented girl, who, for the remainder of her life, just kept flipping from computer to human being at moments notice. 

[britney_rocks]

I have two

Parts of POM sounds like a chicken

And Break The Ice, the little "WOOOOOO" in the background I thought was Mickey Mouse. 

[The Bling]

I must confess I sing the intro to Piece Of Me  Or moan it actually  Every single time 

What even are those sounds though? Are they actual moans? How did they get away with them